place for information on Ross-on-Wye and the Wye Valley
NEWS - ROSS-ON-WYE
Week - [New
Whitchurch Bell Tower - Spring at Gorsley Goffs - Walking Away From
Rehau - Wild Easter Fun - Wendy]
[Hydrogen Monoxide and the L' Oréal Principle - Visitor Figures
- Whitchurch Easter Bazaar - Strange but true]
- Nature Watch - Whitchurch ITC Suite - Topical Photography - Archive
Ross - Heritage - Onion Fayre - Rugby]
[A to Z Site
Hydrogen Monoxide and the L'oréal Principle
I cannot believe that I am having to clarify this but
week's article about hydrogen monoxide was
a joke for April 1st. Hydrogen monoxide, also known
as dihydrogen monoxide is water (H2O).
did receive some amusing tongue in cheek email response.
Many of these arrived from people like myself, with sparsely
populated scalps, informing me that they would be only
too pleased to go blonde. There
is nothing wrong with having a sparsely populated scalp.
God gave some men brains - to others he gave hair! There
were some however who took the matter all too seriously.
In particular, one couple who are currently in the process
of buying a house locally were very worried. I'm sorry
but I have to ask. Are you already blonde?
L' Oréal Principle
by Professor, Lyubov Oréal, a recently graduated
cosmetic biochemist, the L' Oréal Principle was
put to the test by the professor herself when she hired
a crop dusting aircraft and had the clouds seeded with
potassium sulphate (K2SO4)
during a thunder storm.
asked why she had gone ahead with the experiment, rather
than await the usual laboratory test results to determine
the effect that the resulting hydrogen peroxide might
have on local wildlife, she leaned back on the sofa and
brushed her recently acquired, brassy blonde hair from
'Because I'm worth it,' she replied, in an accent which
always makes me wish I had a house brick handy to throw
at the television screen.
With a complete disregard for the effect it would have on local
wildlife, Prof. Lyubov Oréal went ahead and sorted out her hair.
The following is an absolutely true story.
year for 1st April I published a photograph of a yellow
swan on Wyenot News. Despite my retraction
a week later however, to this day people still arrive in
Ross looking for 'General Custard'. Today, Monday 3rd April
2006, I was walking the riverbank photographing kingfishers
and other wildlife when a couple, I guess in their late
fifties / early sixties, noticed my interest in the wildlife
and approached, asking me if I have ever managed to spot
the yellow swan.
'There is no yellow swan,' I replied, 'that was my April
1st joke last year.'
'You're kidding me,' said the man. We've spent a whole year
looking out for it!'
the tale of the boy who cried wolf, perhaps at this point
I had better point out that the Ross-on-Wye
otters and all of the other nature
articles are absolutely genuine.
Figures March 2006
The tourist season is obviously on its way with visits to
the 'Accommodation' page of Wyenot.com taking off in a big
way, as is expected during the month of March. It has returned
to being the second most visited page of the site after
the home page.
I have shown a summary of visitors to the web site for the
past twelve months plus a separate summary for the month
of March 2005. As can be seen, visits doubled during March
2006 compared to the same month in 2005 and this has been
a trend since I first put the web site on line - visitor
figures have at least doubled every year so far. March 2006
showed well over half a million hits and over one hundred
thousand page views. Over the past twelve months the site
has shown 5.38 million 'hits'.
annual renewal rate by advertisers on Wyenot.com has remained
at 100% with advertisers reporting significant business
as a direct result of their advertising pages. Many have
told me that Wyenot.com has proved to be not only the most
cost effective but by a long way, the most successful form
of advertising they have taken.
News' was the third most visited area of the site during
the month, followed closely by the A to Z Index, Pubs, Street
Map and Shops pages.
the average day during March, 3,248 pages of the web site
were viewed by 1,216 people!
Visitor Statistics Summary for wyenot.com
Summary Period: Last 12 Months
April 2005 to March 2006
Generated 02-Apr-2006 15:18
|Summary by Month
April 2005 to March 2006
I otfen mkae msitkaes mesylf, I thnik that sepllnig is vrey
imptroant, othrewsie poelpe canont raed waht you hvae wriettn.
evolved over millions of years, the human brain is a remarkable
machine and provided you have seen a word written down before
and know it, as long as the first and last letters are in
the correct place, the brain can sort out the letters in
the middle without too much difficulty. They do have to
be the correct letters, of course.
sHaPe OF a wOrD is alSo IMpoRTaNt, sO tHIs sENTenCe iS pRoBaBly
mOrE DiFfIcUlT tO rEAd tHAn tHE fIRsT.
YOU HAVE A STORY FOR WYENOT NEWS?
you have a local news item or story of local interest which
you would like to appear on Wyenot News you are very welcome
to submit it by email, telephone or by post.
advise as early as possible if you would like me to photograph
your local event so that I can put it in my diary. This
service is offered strictly on a first come, first served
basis as some days, especially during holiday weekends,
can get extremely busy.
address: Wyenot News, 1, Hillview Road, Ross-on-Wye, Herefordshire.
it is fine to submit if you are submitting an event taking
place in a pub / shop / restaurant etc., please make sure
that your story does have real news value and is not simply
an advertisement for your business. It would be unfair to
those who support Wyenot.com and Wyenot News by advertising
to publish blatant advertisements disguised as editorial
read these terms and conditions before downloading any photograph]
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HR9 7EY. Tel: 01989 763217